My Own Personal Oscar After-Party

Just a couple of thoughts regarding the Oscars. (Besides the fact I predicted all the winners of the six major categories.)

I love the humor and dry wit of hosts Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin. The tone was set nicely right off the bat. I love you Doogie, but you made a better Dr. Horrible and Billy Crystal did a better job with opening musical numbers.

I thought the speeches were thankfully coherent and concise for the most part. The only time they had to theme music someone off the stage, I was glad. Who was that obnoxious woman who interrupted the eloquent man talking about his documentary? I was glad they cut her off.

Did I miss Farrah Fawcett in the dreaded dead people montage? Having James Taylor croak a Beatles tune was a nice attempt to eliminate the tacky "applause meter" of popularity for the recently deceased.

Don't jump around and do gymnastics to music and tell me it's dancing. Dancing involves something called choreography people.

Jeff Bridges and Woody Harrelson are probably already halfway through a stack of hemp even as I write this. Yes, dude, it is a groovy profession.

Even though I am glad to see Kathryn Bigelow win for Best Director and The Hurt Locker was my prediction for Best Picture, I still believe Avatar will be the most influential film made this decade. For better or worse.

Now off to my Oscar After-Party which involves reading Entertainment Weekly for about 5 minutes until I fall asleep. It may only be 9:30 on the red carpet where you are Holly, but it is past my bedtime back on the East Coast.

MY BALONEY HAS A FIRST NAME…IT’S O.S.C.A.R.

Since the presentation of the Academy Awards is actually a television show, I felt I could weigh in with my ill-informed opinion and predictions on this T.V. blog.

The show itself is notoriously lame (check out the Rob Lowe/Cinderella 1989 opening number at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJyzrA1aR3U) if you can stand it. Yet, people still tune in to watch the Motion Picture industry congratulate itself in record numbers every year.

I personally just lifted a ten-year boycott of the awards show. This futile protest heard by none began in 1999 when Shakespeare In Love beat Saving Private Ryan for Best Picture. SIL was a fine little movie, but the impact of SPR is still felt today. It has influenced cinematography and directing style with its inventive battle scenes. It also helped generate enough interest to help raise funds to complete a WWII memorial in Washington D.C. Steven Spielberg won Best Director that same year. What movie did he direct if not the Best Picture? Ridiculous.

Knowing that quality is not necessarily the bottom line, here are my predictions for the major categories for the 82 Annual Academy Awards show on March 7, 2010.

Best Picture: The Hurt Locker
(Avatar’s originality and influence will only grow, but it will go home without the top award this year)

Best Director: Kathryn Bigelow
(I applaud what will be a historic moment when a woman wins in this category, but James Cameron will be eliminated because of his hubris and not for a lesser accomplishment.)

Best Actor: Jeff Bridges (Let’s here it for The Dude)

Best Actress: Sandra Bullock (This is her Erin Brockovich)

Best Supporting Actor: Christoph Waltz
(Unless they decide to use this opportunity to honor a lifetime of work for Christopher Plummer)

Best Supporting Actress: Mo’Nique
(Vera Farmiga and Anna Kendrick will split the Up in the Air vote)

That’s it. I am not doing Art Direction or Costume Design. That is just the crap we have to sit through to get to the categories anyone cares about.
For all the red carpet fashion comments, let me just say… “Back to you, Holly.”